REST IN PEACE, GENTLE PITCHMAN.

Oct 29

The original Oxi-Clean ad.  I love how he says “powerful.”  I first started liking Billy Mays because of his amazing Picksburgh accent.

Oct 28
popscreen:

“Hi, Billy Mays here…”

I can’t remember if we’ve had this on HiBillyMaysHere before or not.  But it’s a good ‘un.
Billy Mays’s $19.95 bill »> that $20 that is (9+11) so we nevar 4get.

popscreen:

“Hi, Billy Mays here…”

I can’t remember if we’ve had this on HiBillyMaysHere before or not.  But it’s a good ‘un.

Billy Mays’s $19.95 bill »> that $20 that is (9+11) so we nevar 4get.

Oct 15
Via:tic-tac-toe:captainkirk:1991
Sep 29

a dead guy is trying to sell me a jupiter jack

doorstop:

i miss u billy mays ;~;

I like when I see Billy’s ads on TV, but yeah, it is a little sad.  I even said “awww” when I saw the Oxi-Clean display at Target yesterday.  (The new lady in the Oxi-Clean commersh can frig right off though)

Sep 28
Could you use Mighty Mend-it on a ripped-up Hulkamania tee?

Could you use Mighty Mend-it on a ripped-up Hulkamania tee?

Sep 23
seanorr:lickdickhardstick:digitalbath:blogkward:hipsterrunoff
Sep 20

Apparently Billy Mays was also in the July/August Playboy. →

I might have a better chance of finding this one.

Sep 20

The Men Behind The Pitch (Electronic Retailer Magazine May 2009 cover story) →

My new quest in life is to somehow find a copy of this issue.

Sep 17
urlesque:

“We have learned in 2009, that there is no greater news story to react to than the death of some1. Many of these death victims are not even very ‘relevant’ to Generation Y. But the process of digital mourning is too ‘fun’ to let some1 die without talking about them. When some1 ‘famous’ dies, u get to share the meme with your friends, and ponder the person’s realistic effect/impact on your life. It seems to be fun when you ‘don’t give a shit’ that some1 famous died, but it is also ‘equally enthralling’ to experience the death of some1 who ‘was a big part of celebrity culture’ (thereby directly impacting ur life).”
- HRO (via jakelodwick)

urlesque:

“We have learned in 2009, that there is no greater news story to react to than the death of some1. Many of these death victims are not even very ‘relevant’ to Generation Y. But the process of digital mourning is too ‘fun’ to let some1 die without talking about them. When some1 ‘famous’ dies, u get to share the meme with your friends, and ponder the person’s realistic effect/impact on your life. It seems to be fun when you ‘don’t give a shit’ that some1 famous died, but it is also ‘equally enthralling’ to experience the death of some1 who ‘was a big part of celebrity culture’ (thereby directly impacting ur life).”

- HRO (via jakelodwick)

Sep 16

“Strange but cool” dep’t: a video game wrestling match between custom avatars of Billy Mays and “Weird Al” Yankovic.  (Found when I was searching to see if Al had made, or planned to make, a tribute song of any kind for Billy)

Sep 12
icodeforlove:
oh Billy

icodeforlove:

oh Billy
Sep 03

Billy Mays Facts

avelvettouch:

  1. You know those guys who can sell ice to the Eskimos? Well Billy Mays sells ice to THOSE guys.
  2. When Billy Mays asks a clerk to break a $20 bill, he gets two $50s back.
  3. Billy Mays fired The Donald. In pre-production.
  4. Billy Mays can make Simon Cowell cry tears of beauty.
  5. Billy Mays interrupted Bill O’Reilly once, causing O’Reilly to profusely apologize for talking out of turn.
  6. Chuck Norris once tried to roundhouse kick Billy Mays. Before his foot even left the ground, Chuck was already on his first of three easy payments of $29.95.
  7. The GDP of Billy Mays is greater than the entire European Union. Before the recession.
  8. In 2006, a man in Arkansas accidentally hit the bass boost button on his home theater remote during a Billy Mays infomercial. We only know this because last December, a team of forensic experts dressed in radiation-proof suits had finished their meticulous examination of the blast crater.
  9. Narwhals wash their tusks with OxiClean.
  10. Billy Mays attributes the power of his on-screen persona to an incident during his teenage years when he accidentally ingested a Caps Lock key from an IBM PS/2 keyboard.
  11. Billy Mays talked Lindsay Lohan into playing for the other team.
  12. A Nigerian scammer once emailed Billy Mays. He is now on his 400th package of Mighty Putty.
  13. Chuck Norris and Billy Mays once had a beard-off. The winner was to get a bucket of OxiClean, and the loser’s penalty was to perform in an ultra-neocon radio show.
  14. Vin Diesel waxes his head with Liquid Diamond.
  15. Billy Mays sold a lifetime of pity and a warehouse full of fools to Mr. T.
  16. Mr. T once tried to throw Billy Mays. Instead of grabbing Billy, however, Mr. T found only a bucket of OxiClean in his hands. He immediately sought atonement through cleaning his gold chains.
  17. After hearing a Billy Mays infomercial, R. Lee Ermey reconsidered his own personal commitment to perpetually yelling.
  18. Billy Mays was the chief component of President Obama’s 2009 stimulus package until the Republicans demanded he be replaced with tax cuts for the stinking rich. Billy made out just as well.
  19. If you act now… hahaha, just kidding! Only Billy Mays has the power to compel you to act now.
  20. Not only did Billy Mays sell ice to the Eskimos, he also sold them the extended warranty.
  21. Billy Mays once sold pain to Chuck Norris.
  22. Joe Piscopo tried to outsell Billy Mays once. ONCE.
Aug 31
Amazing chalk art of Billy Mays

Amazing chalk art of Billy Mays

Aug 27

Hi, Billy Mays here for DC Snowboards!

Nothing will ever top the ESPN 360 spots, but this one is good too.

Via @youngbillymays.

Jul 31
stfuparents:

Mom’s Gold Star Winner 4 is ….. drumroll, please…. Barry! This man shares the same name as America’s President (sort of), AND gave Billy Mays (may He rest in peace) the shoutout he so deserves every time Oxi Clean is ever mentioned for the rest of time. Barry, put ‘em up top for me, friend!
Erica - HOW did you mention Oxi Clean without mentioning Billy Mays? You might be just a touch obsessed with the little one if you can blatantly miss this gleaming opportunity. Take a tip from your pal Barry and don’t it happen again. Get on the ball.
(submitted by Anonymous)

stfuparents:

Mom’s Gold Star Winner 4 is ….. drumroll, please…. Barry! This man shares the same name as America’s President (sort of), AND gave Billy Mays (may He rest in peace) the shoutout he so deserves every time Oxi Clean is ever mentioned for the rest of time. Barry, put ‘em up top for me, friend!

Erica - HOW did you mention Oxi Clean without mentioning Billy Mays? You might be just a touch obsessed with the little one if you can blatantly miss this gleaming opportunity. Take a tip from your pal Barry and don’t it happen again. Get on the ball.

(submitted by Anonymous)